I Couldn't Help Myself

I Couldn’t Help Myself…

                Swallowed, consumed by it. The temptation to do what the voices say is strong, who can fight it? My mind is broken but I still have enough strength within me to reveal the inner machinations of my mind. Have a seat as I spin a yarn for your benefit, or would it be in mine?

            A loner I was, an outcast to even the most trivial of social protocols such as what many would call a clique. Ridiculed, I tried to find solace in the fact that I was of a different breed than they were. I was of better quality, my intelligence was unrivaled and my wit left many breathless. None of this worked in my favor however, as many sought my destruction. I impeded on their progression through the ranks. They climbed the ladder of evolution and I stood on the highest rung pushing them back down. I was physically beaten, battered, and bruised for it was all they could do. Brain was of no concern to these plebeians, so they used brawn to intimidate. Nothing but a pack of rabid dogs these abominations were. No dog should ever dwell within my domain, so they had to go.

            The evening hour set upon us, I sat bedside in silence. My thoughts were given free reign, I sat and listened for the perfect plan. One of these voices would surely give me a plan worth enacting. My mind was made to wander and soon I stood on my feet. I now knew what I had to do and with that I left my sleeping quarters. I ran to my kitchen and I stood in the center. I smelled the air around me and absorbed the essence that filled the room. I walked over to the counter and stared at the drawer. My heart beat began raise suddenly, I could feel sweat dripping down the nape of my neck. I was anxious, It had to be done it was the only way. They had to pay for their transgressions for I am their superior. With one swift motion I grasped the handle, my hand was now pulsating. I yanked back on it, the moonlight shimmering on the silvery delight that was to be the instrument of my revenge. This tool would serve as an extension of my hate for those who would seek to oppose me.

            My residence was now rendered vacant as I approached what would be known as a willing prey. I watched from the shadows, she approached the bathroom no doubt to relieve herself of the stench of the day. This seemed like an optimal idea, she was gonna need the shower soon enough. I skulked through the shrubberies to reach the back entrance of her domicile. I was anxious, I attempted to turn the doorknob but to no avail. The door was locked of course, yet the door was no match for me. I kicked the door and watched as it spun into the darkness that filled the house. I stood at the threshold, listening to see if my prey had heard the disturbance. There was no movement in the house for about five minutes, I took the first step. The floor creaked beneath me as if trying to signal an intruder, I could hear the sound of running water as I approached the stairs. I couldn’t help but chuckle at the idea of ruining her moment of solitude, they always intruded on my happiness but this time I would be the one who knocks.

            I ascended the stairs with great speed; each step brought me closer and closer to my prey. This night would be her last and she had no idea of her role in this affair. I looked at my watch and it read 10:29 pm, I believed it was about time I invited my prey to her own party. After all she was the one hosting it. I stood in silence as the bathroom door was the only thing that separated me and my prey; I pressed my ear against the door and listened. The water was still running, this was my chance to finally absolve her of her sins. She didn’t know how sinful she was but that would soon change for I am righteousness. I am the hammer of justice; it is time for her judgment. The lord acts through me and ME ALONE!!!! HIS WILL IS MY OWN AND HER WRETCHED LIFE SHALL END TONIGHT!!!! I couldn’t help myself, I kicked open the door, destroying the door frame and lock in the process.

            Two personas entered the bathroom, only one would exit. I tore at the curtain, the adrenaline taking control. Her shrieks of terror fed me. The chase was on; the bathroom was no longer the stage as the show was displaced to the living room. She dashed for the phone, clutching it for dear life. Empty threats, nothing fazed me. I turned and pulled the phone out of the wall. “This should be more fun, no interruptions.” Reduced to cowering in the corner, the bravado disappeared it was replaced with fear. I walked closer, tears of desperation a last ditch effort to fight for reason. I instead answered with this, “No tears please, don’t waste a good suffering.” Her screams were music to my ears, slashing repeatedly without hesitation. Blood flying in every direction, I painted a picture. The life force of my prey drained from her corpse that now lay motionless on the floor. I licked the blade.

            From your expression of surprise I would surmise that you were not expecting a full confession on my part. Contrary to your beliefs that is exactly what I gave you. Does it make me a bad person if I enjoyed the thick of it? You don’t seem to understand, I cannot allow you to leave while you know all this. Time and time again I find myself having to indulge these delusions of grandeur. Oh well, I suppose you’ll look just as good as she did I promise.